"Gottu" in Kannada means "I know".A peculiar name to give,I agree,but certainly in keeping with the time-honoured tradition of rechristening the mentally ill in view of their personal fetishes.Our neighbourhood's resident madman's sole aim in life is to learn the time,and then abuse the person he asks,irrespective of whether they tell him the time or not.So, he is the "Time Kelo Huccha", the madman who asks the time.My mother speaks of a "Sooji-Dharada Hucchi", the needle-thread madwoman,so called because she was always seen fiddling with threads.

But coming back to Gottu-he was always impeccably attired.Though his clothes were the same day in and day out,you could try all day,and still not spot a crease or stain on them.He roamed the streets, muttering to himself, "It seems they'll give a car, they'll give a house, they'll give a girlfriend(!)".Left to himself,he was harmless.But us schoolkids knew his red flag, and routinely waved it, too.You only had to shout at him "Gottu, nange gottu!" (I know, I know!), and rage would break like a thunderbolt upon him.He would then begin his litany of curses and abuses-"Onion!Brinjal!(Yes,that's what he called offenders.)I'll burn your house down!I'll sacrifice your mother at an altar!Potato!" Only half-understanding his curses and not being old enough to realize the cruelty of repeatedly provoking him, setting off his gunpowder-like temper and enjoying the explosion was as much a part of our lives back then,as were uniforms, four-lined notebooks and mass P.T.

Various theories abounded as to why the word "Gottu" provoked him so much, but no one ever got to the truth.But "Gottu" became in all of our minds a real-life tragic hero.His mythical image stays with me till today.

She replayed last night's conversation in her head,for what seemed to be the 4000th time.

She had been at a new coffee shop,sitting across a faintly blushing Nayan.Talk had flowed along the usual lines,though Nayan,the debate team captain,seemed definitely off-colour,replying with "Oh's", and embarrassed "Sorry,what was that's".Nothing too out of the ordinary;nice place,lovely music,and chilled coffee with a good friend....

Until Nayan had dropped his bombshell.

"Trish, I, um... ahh.. well, you know...Well,we've been dating for some days now,haven't we?"He ploughed on valiantly,after a deep breath,disregarding Trisha's raised eyebrows at 'dating'. "Well,so,I'd,you know,really like to take this forward,like,as in,uh...get serious about each other... exclusive... if,that's okay with you, that is," he had finished in a flustered gasp.

Trisha was surprised.Way surprised.She'd been polite,and asked for time,and ducked out of the place in a nanosecond.

She sighed again.Nayan wasn't a bad guy.Really sweet,in fact.Smart,ambitious,funny,thoughtful,and okay,rather cute.But get exclusive....well...

Trisha moistened her lips with her tongue...the thrill of her last romantic debacle ran over her.She had gotten over it,sure,but was she ready to commit once again?To stand someone else in Aryan's stead,love and be loved,to trust her heart with another person,all over again?

She gazed out of the window.It was early spring.The days were steadily getting warmer,but the air still retained a crisp,delightful chill.A gust of wind blew into the room,and the windchime tinkled.A nightingale began to coo,again,again,persistantly.Trisha smiled.

As she picked up the phone,she couldn't help being a little flustered herself.The call's respondent was eager.The first ring's trill had barely subsided,when he answered."Hello?"

"Hey,Nayan,this is Trisha...."

As Trisha hit the disconnect button,she was smiling in a way she hadn't for a long,long time.Perhaps even in a new,better way.For she'd learnt something in that one moment she stared out of her bedroom window-there are love stories of the human kind,and even the strongest of them eventually end.Then there is the love story you have with yourself,which is forever.When Cupid strikes for the latter one,there is really nothing the world can throw which will shatter you.

Trisha had allowed herself to love again,this time,with two people.She blew a kiss to the reflection which bloomed in the mirror.She had really found bliss this time.

THE END

Trisha leaned her forehead onto the glass pane of her
bedroom window.It felt cool,soothing.Outside, rain lashed out at the city with
all the fury the ebony clouds could muster; drenching every tree,pebble, and
whitewashed roof; chilling every bone and making the mercury zoom into a
downward spiral.

Inside, though, the rain of Trisha's tears did nothing to
quell the heat of her impotent rage, the scorching flame of her misery, which
every strangled sob only served to increase."I could have borne it if it had
been some other girl," she thought desperately, for the hundredth
time."Anyone,any girl,in all of this whole college.But,Ankita,Ankita.!"

She felt so alone,neglected.Over two weeks,the humiliation
of being cheated had slowly ebbed.She was even slowly getting over not being
with Aryan anymore,trying to steel herself when she saw him occasionally at the
cafetaria or the corridors.But Ankita. It was different with Ankita.She
probably would never get over her.All the times they'd giggled together over
inane things,drooled over a dozen hunks,their mutual fondness for watermelon
juice,and,well,a zillion other things.How could Ankita just throw all of this
away so cheaply,their beautiful friendship?Had her best friend of five years
really been so shallow?Was this Ankita,her Ankita?

Her phone trilled sharply, abruptly slicing across her
thoughts.For a brief,exhilarating moment,she thought it was Ankita,or even
Aryan.She brushed away her tears,and reached for the phone.No.neither of
them.Sarang's name flashed across the neon screen.Disappointment peeked a
little,but a wave of surprise,mingling with relief,soon overtook it.Sarang had
completely disappeared since that fateful day, when he espied his girlfriend
openly cavorting with someone else.He had just gone off,and been incommunicando
as well.Trisha had pushed herself to college each day,and Arundhati's carefully
cheerful tact had achieved it's purpose with Trisha,at least some bit.She had
borne it,been her rational,dutiful self.But Sarang had surprised everyone who
knew him.He'd stopped coming to college,and no one could reach him.Mayank had
said that on that day,while Trisha had fled to the safe confines of the
library, Sarang had stood there,just stood there."That bitch didn't even speak
to him", Mayank had intoned, referring to Ankita."She just made a disgusting
face, and ran off,pulling along her lover boy.""Well, who would have ever
thought that Sarang,of all people would fall this hard for that bimbo?", Jose
often said these days."Sarang, dude;he,well, nothing ever really got to him.He
was the Ice Man."

His friends had just begun to get frantic about him,and
now,he had called on this wet evening,called Trisha,who couldn't find it in her
to help him,for all the brave face she put up.

She nervously hit "Answer" on her phone, and said "Hello."

She almost didn't recognise the voice on the other end,it
was so taut and strained.

"Hey,Trish."

"Sarang, dude, you okay or what?", Trisha asked, the worry
of the past two weeks creeping into her voice despite her best efforts.

"Nah, not one bit, and you know it.But how're you doing?"

"You idiot, where have you been for the past two weeks?Do
you know how worried everyone is?Have you at least kept folks at home in the
know?Where the hell are you now,anyway?"

"Hey, hey, go easy, Trish",came the voice at the other
end;and Trisha could detect a smile behind the bitterness.

"Sarang", Trisha said."Sarang."; and suddenly a storm of
tears broke out; and she couldn't ebb the flow or the sobs despite her best
efforts.

"Trish, listen gal, hey Trisha.listen.don't cry.don't cry,
babe.You'll be okay.don't worry.Trisha?"

Through the wall of her overflowing grief, Trisha could
still sense Saran's concern, despite his own loss; and it touched her.

"Sarang, will you come to college tomorrow?Please say you
will.Arundhati and everyone else is sweet, but oh.I sort of.well,I sort of feel
only you can really understand,you know,about Ankita,I mean."

"Yeah.Yeah,I will.Now please get a hold on
yourself,Trish.Don't wreck yourself this bad.You're such a strong person.You
can get over it.You can handle anything."

Trisha grinned through her tears.Sarang,of all
people,shouldn't have been lecturing her about not going to pieces."I
will.Thanks,Sarang."

"See ya in college,then",Sarang said,and it seemed like some
measure of his purposeful,in-control self had returned.

Trisha disconnected.She smiled.It was good to have a
friend.And no,she didn't think of the one that had betrayed her.Not for this
moment,anyway.

Sarang was back duly the next
day.A little lost,perhaps;and his face went taut and his fists clenched when he
saw Ankita and Aryan walk by hand-in-hand.But on the whole,the Ice Man was
back.He didn't seem willing to talk about anything,and brushed away attempts to
start a heart-to-heart on The Breakup;but he listened to Trisha as she opened
up,quietly and seriously.And slowly,Trisha got over Ankita,too.She was back in
the groove;going to movies,sipping cold coffee on the stairs,laughing freely
and often.Even drank countless glasses of watermelon juice without the sharp
pang.

And it was a relief
that her time didn't have to be stretched between Ankita the new set she
had taken to after enrolling for her degree.And she was definitely glad she was
spared of the Barbie dolls she had had to endure because they were Ankita's
"cutie-cutie,bestest friends,after Trisha,of course".and

Life was good.And even better was that she had a
friend,many,in fact,who were a lot like her-reading Shelley and
Byron,appreciative of twilight
stillness,who didn't presume that Saturday night ought to be spent in a smoky
disc.But could still giggle inanely over nothing,and caper foolishly.

Trisha's heart often went out in a rush of gratitude to her
friends,most of all,Sarang,who had made all of this possible.It was good to
have a friend.

The weather seemed uncertain;fickle in it's loyalty, to the purple rainclouds, or the sun sulking behind them.It seemed to mirror Trisha's current state of being.They had lost the coveted winners' trophy to the hosts, won some, lost some, at the fest.A mix.Her mind,too, wavered, between surges of ecstasy, and bouts of gloom.A feeling of uncertainty, of doubt, prevailed.Aryan played on her thoughts continually.They had gone out a few times, but it didn't constitute as 'serious about each other'.Both yet free birds.How would he react on her arrival?Ankita would certainly have expected a more than hearty welcome, and would have proclaimed to whoever she could lay her hands on, that she would absolutely die in case the male concerned failed in the execution of this cardinal duty.

But that was Ankita.The universally-hailed drama queen.She hadn't the luxury.The sensible, patient, hard-working, agony aunt Trisha Sharma? Naah!!

She stepped into the quad.The old, familiar, cream and mahogany interiors brought a calming influence instantly.On home turf.

She wished Ankita would appear.All that heavy-duty mind chow at the fest had given her a healthy appetite for some good, nonsense, giggly fun.But all she could spot was Sarang, looking his usual purposeful self.She waved, and he marched up to her."Principal's office," he said, before she could venture a "hi"."All the team's up there, and as usual, you're always the one we have to go looking for."Trisha grinned."Seen Anki yet?", she asked."Nope," he replied, shaking his head."Cell's switched off, too.Now I know why you two are so thick; both think it's fun to run off so no human contact strikes you." Trisha playfully hit him with a file."PJ." Sarang ducked, then pulled a serious face, as he led her into the Principal's office.

Everything in the office looked sombre and set for a funeral, including it's inhabitants.Trisha and Sarang quietly took their seats, and waited out the speech that followed.They were then sent off to class.

The bell for lunch finally rang, and Trisha allowed herself to be swept forwards by the throng, stopping finally at the quad.At long last, she saw what she had been waiting for-Aryan leaned lazily against a platform, his arms crossed.She smiled, and made to hurry towards him, when Ankita approached from the opposite end."Double whammy," she thought, and took a step forward, only to stop dead in her tracks.

Aryan had risen with expectant pleasure, and Ankita wrapped her arms round his neck, with a half-shriek of "Helllooo baby!!!"Aryan leaned down to look into her face, cupping it with his hands, the same hands which had held Trisha's in a darkened movie theatre and made her pulse race.They seemed to be talking, whispering.

Ankita suddenly caught sight of Trisha.Her eyes seemed to show a hint of fear for a fleeting moment, but then, her face settled into a calm, haughty expression.She nudged Aryan, and they both turned to face her."Hey, Trish", Ankita said."It's good to see you again," in a tone which made it evident that it wasn't.She caught Trisha looking at Aryan, with a shocked, bewildered expression; and drawled, "Hey, didn't tell you, did I?Well, you were gone, and yeah, so was Sarang, and we... well, got lonely, and decided to get together, like, you know, committed."Trisha nodded numbly, her mind a total blank, except for the faint pounding, the pounding of misdirected love, the pain of being cheated by the two people she had relied on the most....."Yeah", she said, still nodding."I... gotta go... library....", and she fled upstairs.

Just a few paces behind, she glimpsed a shell-shocked Sarang.Evidently, he had heard all.She briefly saw the same pain, hurt and sense of betrayal....an exact mirror.But Trisha no more wanted to see any more mirrors of her self.

Numbly, she just sped on.

TBC